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I just finished listening to the first episode of Neil Gaiman’s Neverwhere on BBC’s iplayer and it is fantastic. I’m a little behind. There are 3 episodes available to stream. The first episode came out Monday and there will be a new episode daily through Friday. I believe they’ll be available to stream online through March 31st, but check it out for yourself. The cast is amazing and I love listening to this kind of dramatization.

This afternoon I finished reading Swan Song by Robert McCammon. It was a sprawling epic of a post-apocalyptic book with a lot of interesting supernatural elements and commentary on humanity. Probably not the best thing to be reading when you’re a little stressed already as it tended to bleed into my thought processes in unexpected ways.

The other day I looked out the window at the blue sky and I found myself sort of subconsciously shocked. Then I realized I had somehow blended reality with the fiction I was reading and of course there’s blue sky. This is sunny California in early Spring, not post-apocalyptic nuclear winter in Missouri. I’ve also had weird impulses to horde everyday items and hide them in defense against looters and vandals. Not something I actually need to worry about in my everyday life. It was weird things, too, like firewood and pens. I shake my head at myself when I realize where my thoughts have strayed. It’s funny how fiction can have such an impact. Fictional characters can often be more real to me than actual people I meet. I think it must be the extra glimpse into their psyche, knowing how they think and what motivates their actions. We are able to get closer to them than any casual acquaintance we meet, sometimes even closer than some friendships allow.

Now I face the task of determining what to read next. Too many options!

I’ve been reading Rilke’s poetry off and on between chapters of Swan Song and I continue to be amazed by the power of his wordplay. Something about his poetry is just nailing me where I live right now. I feel like my chest has been cracked open and my beating heart exposed to the air. He is astounding.

I wanted to post some of his poetry a few weeks ago, highlighting differences in a couple different translations, but today I just want to catch up on mentioning a few things. It’s hard for me to keep posting at times. I don’t always know what it is that I want to say.

I’m not really working on anything interesting right now. I’ve been a little burned out and trying to rest up and realign myself. I’ve let a lot of personal things slack and now I have to catch up. I have a couple of knit projects I’m still working on and a few more that I need to start. I’ve been writing a little more and tinkering with some ideas, and I’ve got some letters to finish. Other than that it’s all work, work, begrudgingly go to sleep, work.

My goal is to keep interested. I want to maintain the feeling that there is possibility and potential for great things in the world. If I can keep myself hungry, then I will continue to find new and interesting things to feast upon. I think that’s a worthy start.

B

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